Do you want to cut yourself?

4 Aug

Let me just put this into context, so you don’t think I’m some sort of depressed emo. And so you don’t think Hannah is ridiculously strange. Although sometimes she is. That’s toddlers for you.

I made the kids some fish sticks and vegetables for dinner.

“What’s this fork for?” Hannah asked me as she held up her plastic-handled, metal-pronged Dora The Explorer Fork.

Dora the Explorer Flatware Spoon & Fork Set

“I thought you might want to use it with your vegetables. You don’t have to, you can use your fingers.”

“Oh. Can I use it to cut my fish fingers?” That’s what they’re called over here. Fish Fingers. Not fish sticks. In case you were confused. I explained to Hannah why they were called fish fingers a few minutes before this conversation(because they are made of fish and look like fingers. I think that is quite relevant to this conversation).

Fish Sticks

“Sure.”

Of course I thought she’d do what normal people do and cut it on her plate. But she is 3. So she didn’t. She picked up the fish stick, held it in her right hand, and then started cutting it with the her left (she’s left-handed).

“Careful sweetie, don’t poke yourself. Put it on your plate to cut it.”

She was still in the fork-is-a-knife mode, so she said “do you want to cut yourself Mommy?”

“No, I certainly don’t! That would hurt!”

“Why.”

Sigh.

“Because I’d be bleeding and getting cut hurts.”

“Can you cut you and then eat you?”

I stifled my laughter-mixed-with-shock/horror “No Sweetie, we can’t eat ourselves. Or anyone else. We don’t eat people.” Did I seriously just have to tell my daughter that?

“We could cut you up and then put you back together again.” I think perhaps she’s been doing too many jigsaw puzzles. Or cutting too many fish fingers.

“It doesn’t work like that Sweetie. If you cut me up, then I’d be gone forever.”

“Then God would have to make a new Sheri,” she said with glee. I’m hoping the glee was because she called me Sheri instead of Mommy, and not because she wants a new Sheri.

“It doesn’t work that way either Hannah!”

Giggling, she told me “That’s quite a story!”

Seriously, where does she come up with that stuff?

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3 Responses to “Do you want to cut yourself?”

  1. NewLifeOnTheRoad (@NewLifeOnRoad) August 4, 2012 at 9:39 pm #

    out of the mouth of a babe!

  2. Jennie August 8, 2012 at 10:33 pm #

    Funny! Kids say the best things!

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