The rude boy

As I drove to the gym, a semi-truck kept pace in the lane next to us.

“Big f**k!” Daniel declared excitedly, pointing and flapping.

I did a double take.  Did he really just say that?  “Yeah, big truck.” I said, emphasising the t.

“Big f**k, big f**k!”

I held it in as much as I could, but some laughter managed to escape me.  I certainly didn’t want to encourage foul language, but at the same time, it was rather hilarious hearing the f-word so innocently coming out of a 20 month old child’s mouth.

“Big f**k in the tunnel!” Daniel told me with glee the other day, driving one of his toy trucks under his wooden toy railway bridge.

Yesterday we went to Fantastic Furniture to get a desk chair.  Daniel wanted to sit in every chair and on every couch they had.  Hannah wanted to look at the bunk beds.

One bunk bed in particular caught the eye of both kids.

“BIG F**K BED!!!!!!!!” Daniel yelled loudly with a giant smile across his face.  He ran over to the bed and climbed on the bottom bunk.  He loves beds as much as he loves trucks. “BIG BOUNCY F**K BED!!!!”

“Big f**k bed!”

Let’s just say I’m glad I was the only customer in the shop at that time, or I would have some serious explaining to do.

The rudeness doesn’t just cover trucks though.  It also extends to socks.  He can say sock, he’s said it many times before, but the other day he suddenly started saying cock instead.

There are no socks Daniel likes better than his dinosaur socks.  He has about 3 pairs.  In addition to trucks and bouncy beds, Daniel also loves dinosaurs.

“DINOSAUR COCK!!!!!” Daniel announced happily when I sat him down to put his socks on.  I couldn’t help myself.  Despite my best efforts not to, I laughed.  Out loud.  Which of course egged him on.  “DINOSAUR COCK, DINOSAUR COCK!”  He said, clearly pleased with himself.  “I have dinosaur cocks.”

Note to self: no matter how hard it is, DO NOT LAUGH when son accidentally swears.

If you enjoyed reading this, please vote for my blog. All you have to do is click the link below. That’s it… Clicking the link brings you to the Top Mommy Blogs home page. You don’t have to do anything else. Any clicks from my site to theirs is a vote.  THANKS!

Like my blog? ‘Like’ it on facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Mommy-Adventures/203964682967827?ref=tn_tnmn

Pin It You officially have my permission to pin this (as long as it links back to my site).  Just don’t act like you wrote it. Because you didn’t….

Copyright 2013 Sheri Thomson

Dear parking jerk:

Dear (if I knew how to do that thing where you put a line through Dear and then use another word, I’d totally do that here) driver of the ute (truck) who parked across the sidewalk a few houses down:

What were you thinking? Could you not be bothered to pull in the extra 8 feet so you weren’t blocking the entire sidewalk? Did you not know that it is actually illegal to park across the sidewalk? Of course it is. Duh.

And here’s why: The driveway you decided to pull up to, but not in to is just after a corner. A crazy corner at the top of a hill where people drive way to fast and accidents happen there all the time. Like the one our car got into just the other week. And then another car 2 days later, and another one a couple days after that.

You parked so the front of your truck was just barely past the fence of the property you were visiting. Or live at. Not sure which. There was only about a foot between the fence and your truck. Not enough room to push a wide pram containing two kids through.

Your ute was all the way across the sidewalk and past the shoulder of the road.

How did you expect pedestrians to get past your truck? Were we supposed to trespass on your property by going around the front of your truck and through a bit of your yard? Oh wait, we couldn’t fit through there anyway.

Were we supposed to go around the back of your truck, forcing me to push the pram IN THE ROAD at the crazy corner?

Oh, did you expect me to fly? Dig a ditch under the driveway? Fold up the pram and go around the front?

In this particular spot, there is a decent sized hill just before the curb. I could have gone back the way I came just a little way, but the little hill was impassable with the pram over there. AND the corner of the road was right there.

So what was I to do Mr. Parking Jerk?

There was no room on the driveway between your truck and the curb for me to nicely push the pram down the gentle slope from driveway to road.

I had to push my pram with two children in it over the hill just before the curb and then down onto the road. I got over the hill ok. But then the pram was stuck. Did I mention that there was a dip in the road just after the curb? So little hill plus dip on the other side made for quite a big hill when you’re talking about getting a pram through.

Were you watching me struggle as I nearly toppled the pram over getting around your jerk truck?

I had to go around the front of the pram and pull the front wheel up to get up the dip, making the back wheels drop off the curb rather violently. Just to get around your truck. Which never should have been parked there in the first place.

Then I had to wait on the shoulder next to the butt of your truck, which, as I mentioned, was blocking the whole shoulder too, and watch for oncoming traffic.

When I couldn’t see anyone coming, I had to make a mad dash IN THE ROAD to get around your truck, all the while hoping that no one came flying around that crazy corner and into the back of us.

Did you see me running around your truck? Did you see me struggling to get the pram up the curb and over the hill on the other side? Did you just watch from the window and laugh, you parking jerk?

Maybe next time you’ll park properly. As in, NOT blocking the sidewalk. Or maybe you won’t. Maybe you really are a jerk, not just in my mind because I’m annoyed at having to push my kids in the road due to your selfishness.

Sigh.

Seriously though, WHY DO PEOPLE PARK LIKE THAT?!?!?!?!

If you enjoyed reading this, please vote for my blog. All you have to do is click the link below. That’s it… And if you are an email subscriber, clicks from your email don’t count.  If you would like to vote, please go to my blog and vote from there. THANKS!

Like my blog? ‘Like’ it on facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Mommy-Adventures/203964682967827?ref=tn_tnmn

Pin It You officially have my permission to pin this (as long as it links back to my site).  Just don’t act like you wrote it. Because you didn’t….

Copyright 2012 Sheri Thomson