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If I won a groupon voucher

Groupon is having a blogger competition to win a $500 Groupon voucher. I just have to tell them, in all my creativity, what I’d use the voucher for. Fictitious or not.

So…This is a no brainer.

I’M SICK OF POOP!!!!!!!!!!!! You all know of my struggles with potty training. Hannah pooping on her foot. Constantly pooping in her underpants, but refusing to wear a nappy. Ugh. The list goes on. Torture.

I would use every last cent of that voucher to pay a potty training guru to come to my house and train my daughter. Said guru would clean up every poo that got smushed all over Hannah’s underpants. Guru would wipe all the poo off of Hannah’s legs and butt. She would scrub the poopy underpants clean. Heck, she would even clean all the poopy underpants that I have soaking in a bucket of nappy san in the laundry room that I have been avoiding for a week. Disgusting I know, but I hate dealing with it.

Guru would lovingly (and quickly) teach Hannah to poop in that lovely big girl toilet instead of her underwear. And it wouldn’t take long, she’s a guru.

And what would I be doing whilst guru fixed poopy messes? Eating cake and drinking hot chocolate while I watched the chaos, delighted that it wasn’t me dealing with it.

If only. Sigh.

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